From the first day (Pt V)

My phone rang at 7 sharp. A fairly punctual man. I went down and he was there. He was wearing a white shirt and jeans. He left the shirt 1/4 unbuttoned. Cool, I thought. I always like men in white shirts. No flowers, no gifts, ok that is not quite a date. Well, at least I know he wont be confessing. I hope not.

He brought me to a nice bar. I thought we were suppose to be having dinner. Anyway, it's ok. After we sat, we just talked, and then I wondered, why arent we ordering, I am hungry. Before I asked, the waiter brought soup. "I have ordered for us, hope you dont mind." I smiled... and then the dinner began. I loved the food.

We did not mention anything about that day. We just laughed and ate and drank. Before we knew it, we are already at our 3rd bottle of Moet Chandon.

"You heard what Dave & I said that day right?" he asked. Wow, that really caught me by surprise. I thought he would not ask. Oh dear, I was speechless, didnt know what to say. Finally I spilt out "aha."

"Erm, yes, I like you a lot. I have always liked you, even before the divorce." Me, silence again. "It's ok, you dont have to say anything. It's just something I need to get out of my heart. It has been there for so long. I feel so much better now. The other day when I saw you, I know I cannot let go of any chances, so I went massage with you. When the guy hit you, I felt the pain too. I'm so sorry."

I finally broke the silence, "Are you drunk?" what the hell, I am such an idiot, what a question.

He took my hand and put on his chest. His hand was warm, very, and so was his chest. I can feel his heart pumping. "Can you feel my heart? It beats this fast everytime I see you." he was looking into my eyes. "Give me another 2 bottles, then talk to me bout drunk."

I stood there, still. I really didn't know what to say. I like him, but I don't want to start anything. It's kind of hard for me to get back into a relationship again. What will my kids think? How are his family going to accept me? He interrupted my thoughts, "Are you ok?" I just looked at him - lost of words.

He let go off my hand. "I know it's hard for you to accept me in such a short time. You don't have to say anything, like I've said, I just wanted you to know how I feel." I don't know what made me hold his hands again. I took his hand and put on my chest. "This is how my heart beats whenever I see you."